This one is for all of us last minute shoppers. Maybe next year the kids will get the real Fingerlings, but for now they may have to content themselves with ones made in Latveria. Not sure why the box said “Frangerlings.”

Just kidding, I’m a writer. We can’t afford the real thing.

-Mark “Please buy our books”


I had never heard of Stryper before this. My life is diminished now that I have. I’m listening to some Ozzy, Anthrax and King Diamond to cleanse myself.

-Alex “Barking at the Moon”


Liar! I saw that life-sized Stryper cardboard cutout you keep in your apartment. Trying to cover it with a sheet when company is over is just an invitation to snoop, you know.

Mark “What’s under here…?”